Expectations can be high or low, reasonable or unreasonable, good or bad. Uncommunicated expectations are one of the primary sources of conflict in relationships. At Foot of the Cross fxchurch, we never ask our members to do more than the Bible clearly teaches. We ask our members to do what the Bible expects every believer to do. The basics of these expectations are spelled out in the fx Membership Covenant at the end of this class.
Family Chores
Just like any family, there are things that are expected for all family members to do. There are things that need to be done regardless of whether we like them or are gifted to do them. These are what we call chores. We can and should all be willing to do chores to care for our family. Sometimes we will be asked and other times we need to just be observant and serve as an act of worship. He often uses these chores to teach about our SHAPE. God will even regularly call us do chores in our weakness to humble us and make us fully aware of His strength (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). In doing these chores, we should find joy and fulfillment. No one may have the gift or enjoyment of doing the dishes, but we all need and want clean dishes. If you do the dishes, you can take joy in knowing you provided for the family (Mark 9:33-37, Matthew 20:25-28).
Family No's
In any family, there are things that certain family members can not do or should not be allowed to do. These no's should be determined as a family in an attempt to help each other surrender more of our lives to God and each other. In families, it is often necessary to tell someone NO to what they want to do for the benefit of the family OR to tell someone TO DO something for the benefit of the family. We recognize that we CAN do all things through Christ who gives us strength (Phil 4:13), but that does not mean we should. Navigating these things as a family helps us discover our SHAPE.
Whether we give a yes or no or are given a yes or no, we should look to Jesus and the Holy Spirit to help us fulfill our yes and no or repent of our yes or no (Matthew 5:37). We live in a culture that simply hates being told what they should and should not do. God loves us enough to tell us no showing us the truth about Himself, others, and ourselves (Hebrews 13:16-17, Ephesians 5:15-21).
Family SHAPE
In any family, there are the things that family members seem designed to do. These are typically discovered over a long time time, through trial and error, in the context of practice and observation, and confirmed by others.
S.H.A.P.E. (Spiritual Gifts, Heart, Ability, Personhood, Experience) is a way we use to help people discover their God given unique place in His family. We desire that our members see God's process of discovering their SHAPE through the chores and the no's. Grateful humble obedience prepares us to step out in faith as God reveals our unique S.H.A.P.E. as confirmed by His family (1 Corinthians 12:4-31, Ephesians 4:11-16).
Side Note: One of the major expectations that can fight God’s plan for His family is when people unhealthily prioritize serving the local church family over their personal family (extremely rare today) OR unhealthily prioritize serving their personal family over the church family (extremely common today). We live in a culture that typically does not trust God and His family to help us know how to prioritize and discipline our time, talents, treasures, and testimonies. We desire fxchurch membership to help us be better disciples and family (Matthew 10:16-42, 1 Timothy 5:8, Titus 1:5-9, 1 Tim. 3:1-7, 1 Peter 5:1-4).
What high or low, reasonable or unreasonable, good or bad expectations might you have for God's family the church?...for yourself in God's family the church?
Are these expectations supported by scripture? (explain from scripture)